IsAIaH 55:9

"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts."

Quote

"If the truth doesn't save us, what does that say about us?"

LOIS MCMASTER BUJOLD

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

pressure


The 4oth anniversary dinner is coming up


And i've been asked to play for the opening number which i arranged. And i can't, i just can't. there's just too many things for me to handle and if i were to take this on, it would probably the last straw to signing me out with a burnout. I mean, i've said no so many times and it's so hard. the problem is, i understand how difficult it is what with everyone so busy and caught up at this time of the year.

I thought it was over the first time i said no. but they managed to come up with some very workable solutions, but still it was too risky and seemingly volatile a decision to make, and not wanting to sacrifice the time i needed for my studies i said no again. Then this time it was a change in rehearsal time to accommodate me.. and yet for some reason i couldn't see light at the end of the tunnel so i've said no again.

And by this point on monday night i was beginning to feel really rotten. I mean there's help needed, why is it i can't just go and give it? quite simple really, because my exam starts the very next morning after the dinner.

then Mabel (best friend) called.. "eh Karl, i heard the recording of the opening number you orchestrated. Cannot understand lah.. quite complicated. we REALLY need you to come play... you're gonna have to tell them what to do and all".

sigh.. i'm at a loss now..


1 comment:

adriansern said...

i'm pulling my hair out trying to get things to work too.